Crying my eyes out

I wish I could go Back in Time when I was happy and I had friends that came around  instead I fell in a six year depression there's nobody to talk to just stuck in the walls of this house . I take care of my daughter and each day I knew my best friend drifted apart slowly until yesterday was the End somebody else took what I called mine history has repeat  itself a kid and alone . For five years I got mad at god that feeling left me but it has slowly reappeared ... Mad at god wondering why have I suffered all my life with a mother and father who have seemed to care less a family that's distant ad treat me like a outsider I am more convinced each day that I was born to suffer every thing and everybody I love gets Tooken away from me I don't know who a real friend and who not for three years I have cries nightly for what and who I lost and once again depression follows me  I have to witness other people in love and I have nobody it's now 2:08 in the morning and I'm crying my emotions are like a light switch trying to force myself to move on ... Holding my daughter as She sleep because with a lifetime of loss she all I have near all I have left and I'm constantly sick been for Monthe now i so at times want to give up  cause I have nothing and nobody left