Besides my vent blog the brighter side of things

oh man i had such a somewhat great day i received my Motorola clutch it so cool the text kinda will take some time to get used too ....
i thought of my bookie while looking at it the color the available everything ....
sometimes i wonder tho is somebody heart true that they don't reply back when i say i love you maybe cause they don't feel it and maybe i should leave it alone the thought instead of worrying if the person hate me or something ........

Ive been looking at my Betta fish (midnight iris ) and (jade) they seem alot happy in there nice clean bowls i put a live plant in there so they can feel better it seem to cheer them up and put some brine shrimp in there they really liked it maybe i will do a YouTube video .......
i started thinking of all the wonderful questions in the world and what could be the answer i gave a beautiful answer to a question asked today maybe the question will be asked again who knows ......

when i love i love hard each day i love even harder so maybe i should stop before i scare a love away that usually what happens anyway ... who knows what the future will hold but sometimes i feel like I'm gonna be brokenhearted at the end of my rope ....i pray to god that each turns out better because each day i feel no hope at times i eat once a day like today wishing i had a meal and a family to share that with but all i have is nothing but loneliness and tears its like at some point my body adapts that i only eat once or twice a day praying to god wondering where my next meal or if unemployment gonna grant me a extension because I'm gonna need it this i feel is the roughest I've been smiling on the outside and crying on the inside with only cigarettes to comfort me at night which isn't good sometimes i go without those even though i have it people claim they don't have much but look at my situation and they should be glad they go to bed with a full belly ......i know the lord will make away times will get better i guess i have to keep the faith even though it feel like i have nothing left anyway bout to get teary eyed think i need a ciggy goodnight folks love peaches

people dont care so why should i (march vent blog)

im so angry right now what im really feeling i would right in my journal but it seems my feelings dont matter or the word i love you dont have no meaning as to me feeling like i do ....

so damn angry with myself tired of trying to figure if love is real or not or am i being played with emotionally because the departing will depart ......



no room for me anymore and i cant help to cry with built up frustration and anger that i will keep to myself i hate this and i hate feeling this way but nobody ever thinks about how serious i am when i say i love you maybe im venting or maybe in a away im hurting and nobody care to notice nada aka nothing besides what going on with them ... how im always there to be a friend to listen but nobody want to listen to me ......oooh im not gonna say it just gonna shut up ........just going to shut up hopefully i will feel better tomorrow

The End

The more i can say each day something get its on my nerves where people feel like i got to answer to them .
I dont answer to nobody .

people think they have the reason to ask me questions and im like im not 2 years old if something was going on then i would fess up but nothing is going on but me trying to have some peace and safety in my life .

The damage has been done and im sick of the drama and the pain people
trying to find anything to argue with me about or to start something .
when its really there problem not mines
they the one who have the damn issues not mines .

Because people are a certain way dosnt mean i got to be
my parents can hate a certain person not i .


god is the only one who controls me
he knows what i do everyday so i have no reason to feel guilty about anything
because im not doing nothing wrong to anybody .

Trying to live if anything instead of all these crazy azz insecure people putting stress on me because they want to have a temper tantrum . contributing to my damn death if anything .

wanting me to damn die but i wont give them the damn satisfaction of doing so

dracula

i kinda relate to the book beside the blood of course
it seem that he had a strong mind connection to mina
he was in her thoughts he read her mind .
like his love was stronger to survive death and conqour it and accept it .
have you ever been in love like that .....

that days go by or hours go by and you seem to feel your love calling you
or there smell still lingers in the air as of there favorite cologne


or there voice tends to echo in your head
or maybe they meet you in your dreams make the dreams become so fine
i'm hoping that i dont sound crazy how i love him so that i carry my love for him in my heart and he whereever i go just like i carry the love of my son everywhere i go

and it tends to comfort me when i am alone or i hold my teddy bear tight and dream a dream that makes me not want to wake up am i making sense i think or do i think not

Romeo Romeo where thou art is Romeo ?(poem)

I so love your smile your touch the smell of your cologne
the way your eyes look into mines
the way your heart look out for other's
the way you can bounce back from any situation
the way you make me feel inside as well as out .......

so its like when im not with you i have to say
romeo ..... romeo where thou art is romeo ?
is he near
are you near my love cause i can feel your presence when you not here .....
will you be here
will you be here soon

will you ?