Depression gets skin deep but im praying for god to help me get thru this time

Depression is slowly getting the best of me but im looking as god will give me the strength to get thru this i know if i dont have anybody in the world atleast i have god. Atleast i know he is there

so i look at things diffrent then everybody else the world to me is a joke not like how it used to be mostly full of people who act like they have a image are ashamed to ask for help . getting so much attention that they have left god behind backslidding christians .
why is that huh ?

I believe my life will be happy again and i will smile again and not have to worry or have a care in the world for the folks who dont have a care for me .

to know and understand how i feel is like getting up realizing you are a ghost as if you are dead to the world . as if the world has said F#ck you and kept going people hearts have only turn to material things timberlands jordans black labels what happen when a new fashion comes out ? you leave the old fashion in the dust have to have this image to show the next stranger im all that and im doing this when really all they doing is false advertising . the reason so many good people are by past is because men and women are so quick to find a look alike of a celebrity .
celebrity bleed they go thru sorrow and at the end of there career they either in jail or they die .

they just have a legacy that will die with the generations that knew of em .

i havent touched a ciggarette in monthes crazy huh i used to use a ciggarette to hide the pain and really it didint hide anything .it just revealed that i was trying to hide something .

waking up with no son to hold in my arms and it seems like nobody feels the saddness of being away from your child. and pretending like everything is alright it isnt alright this is not earth this hell you cant even go down the street wondering will that be your last day on earth . this is nuts huh crazy tears fall on my pillow for a better life a better family that will understand that depression isnt a thought its a sickness also . i have been depressed for years sometimes it turns off like a light switch but then there are times that it turn back off .